Best Divorce Lawyers

Children of Abuse

Every day it seems that local and national media stations tell stories concerning abuse that has been perpetrated on children, reminding us of the plight of children of abuse. We hear stories of children being starved, beaten, imprisoned, burned, and emotionally and sexually abused. Milk cartons, newspapers, shopping carts and billboards carry the message that a child only needs to call a hotline and help will arrive shortly.

However, even when a suspected child abuse incident has been reported, this does not always end up safeguarding the child from further abuse. Many times some of the worst cases are those that the authorities had been notified of, and further determined that the child was indeed at risk, yet the child was left in the care of the abuser. In other incidents, such as when an abused partner flees from domestic violence, the children are often the innocent witnesses to the battering. In too many cases the abuser not only takes it out on their spouse, but harms the children as well.

There is a part of family violence that not everyone is aware of and that is granting sole custody or unsupervised access to the abuser. Unfortunately, for children of abuse, the American Judges Foundation says that the most common reason for someone to go back into an abusive relationship is because they are afraid that the abuser may carry through on the threat of taking their children away from them. Unbelievably, studies have shown that in 70% of the challenged custody cases the abusers convinced everyone that the victim was undeserving or unfit to have sole custody. It is no wonder that there are so many child protection issues.

The mere idea that child abusers actually do get awarded custody even when there has been a domestic violence conviction or reliable evidence of child abuse is absolutely bizarre. Even those who have experienced it would not have thought it possible until it happened to them.

It has been assumed that judges look at a history of domestic abuse, weigh any medical evidence and listen to the words of the abused children, and then decide if the child needs protection. Often children of abuse do decide to tell, believing there will be help. Yet when none is forthcoming, how can an abused child believe that they deserve help and protection?

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