Best Divorce Lawyers

The realistic approach to divorce

A divorce is not always amicable. In fact I would say that two out of ten divorces end amicably. In cases were they do end amicably, both parties would come and consult the attorney together and instruct him to draft a settlement agreement for signature. 80% of the time this is not the case however. Go to marriage advice for more information.

A client very often tells the attorney that he/she is prepared to hand over a large portion of the assets to the other spouse, as he/she believes that the parties will remain good friends after the divorce. I as an attorney very often warn them against this, as circumstances change, especially when a spouse moves on in their life after the divorce.

I always urge my clients to picture a worst case scenario ten years down the line when your beloved ex-partner has somebody else in his or her life. Those assets which you were so quick to hand over during the divorce would then be enjoyed by your ex-spouse and his/her new partner.

One should try and always ensure in reaching a divorce settlement that the interests of your blood relations are protected, to prevent a situation from arising where your hard earned money may be spent in a way that you did not intend it to be. One should also ensure that straight after the divorce you change your will, in order to prevent a situation from arising where your ex-spouse inherits and this was not your intention. Refer to separation advice for more information.

The realistic approach to a divorce would be for you to be 100% sure that you are making the correct decision in handing over the assets. One does not want a situation to arise where at great costs you may have to apply for rescission of the divorce order due to a hasty decision made by yourself. South Africa, unlike other countries, facilitates quick divorces. There is no waiting period after a divorce in South Africa where the divorce can be cancelled, and you can get divorced any time after the marriage. One must therefore be cautious before making hasty decisions.

Should I advise my spouse of the divorce action which I intend to institute? This is very much of a personal question. I would suggest that it is possibly better to play open cards with your spouse, and to advise him or her that you intend to institute a divorce action.

It may serve to save astronomical costs if you discuss with your spouse why you want the divorce and how you wish the assets to be divided. It would further be beneficial to discuss the divorce prior to seeing an attorney, as issues such as where the summons can be served can also be agreed on. Normally a divorce summons is served either at a person’s home or at his/her work address. It must be served personally. Some people do not like accepting service of the divorce summons at their work address, as it is embarrassing for them when the sheriff arrives there with the divorce summons.

Very often a client asks an attorney whether it would make a difference as to which spouse institutes action first. The answer to this is no, as the party on whom the summons has been served will in any event be able to answer to that summons with a plea and a counterclaim. The counterclaim in fact has the same effect as instituting action against somebody by means of a summons.

It very often happens that two parties within a few days of each other institute action against each other by means of a divorce summons. In such a case the summons that was issued first at court is the one that is followed. Should the parties communicate with each other prior to instituting action, a situation like this can be prevented.

Divorce battles are very much tactical by nature. A client’s communication with his/her spouse is part of the tactics, and plays a big role in settling the matter, almost as important as the role of the attorneys, and may save exorbitant costs. I would suggest that you indicate to your partner at the start that you wish to institute the divorce action, and that you have no hidden agendas. Visit divorce advice for further information.